The Man's Guide to Cunnilingus Pt. 3

If you’re new to this discussion, read Part One here, Part One-B here, and Part Two here.

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We left off with me urging you to get in touch with your inner bastard and enter her for two or three teasing, taunting thrusts before leaving her wanting more.
That done, feel free to grin mischeviously and tell her she has to wait until you’ve done your duties. Tease her a little, but you’re going south, boy.
As you slither back down her body, you can again drag your hands down the sides of her torso, slipping over her love handles and down over her hips, remembering that staying in touch with all of her will help shut down those inhibitions every woman has from time to time — and that pays hefty dividends as the night grows not-so-young.
To switch things up now, you can slip your hands down, around, and over her ass from behind, tugging those fleshy inner thighs out of the way as you suck and nibble down over the mons, this time stopping to make acquaintance with the clit, since you’ve already teased it once.
Purse your lips on it and very gently, almost imperceptibly start to suck. Lick it softly as you suck, flickering your tongue over its tip, almost snake-like, which will start to get her very, very aroused. She’s going to want more. But don’t be surprised if she adjusts her legs or shifts her hips. And do not misunderstand this.
She doesn’t want you to enter her, but is only trying to add to the experience by getting herself into a new position that allows for a different sensation. She may even slightly lift her hips, but this could mean she’s just tightening all those regional muscles so she gets more bang for the buck, just like you clench your ass muscles to make yourself harder when she’s going down on you. It’s not a vacancy sign suggesting you move in, boys. Continue what you’re doing.
So, techniques, then? All right, pretend you’re having a fudgesicle (ice cream on a stick for the foreign readers) that’s been sucked down to half its size, but is still wide at the base: Open your lips as wide as they can go and drag them, sucking harder as you go, over the surface of her twat until you’re pursing around her clit again. Now and then, throw tongue action into it, too, flicking hard, then soft, and vice versa, over the top of the clit.
You can even give her a twirlie, where you just encircle the clit with your tongue — round and round and round we go. (Remember, the clit protrudes in a recessed area, so there’s those little cavernous depressions around its base, and this would be where you’d be twirling around… every bit as sensitive as the clit’s mound itself, but not as sexually rewarding, so it heightens the tease for us.)
If you’re confident she’ll enjoy it and you know how sensitive to go, you can start to gently nibble the clit from time to time.
But be careful: You spend too long here and you’ll make her orgasm very quickly. Which is GREAT, but to get your bang for your buck, hold out on her and torturously delay the result. It may well be in your favour to only give her one mind-boggling orgasm versus two or three smaller ones. I’m a quality, not quantity gal, myself.
Another trick is to raise one of her legs and chew on the back of the thigh, slowly working your way back to her twat with your mouth, while your fingers of your other hand stroke and toy with her labia. This is one of those moves you can make that interrupts something powerfully arousing like clit-sucking, since she’ll be delighted at the new sensation, but will still be wanting you to return to her sex. That you make your way there slowly, tauntingly is something that’ll bring a smile to her lips as she deliciously waits it out.
Now, it doesn’t matter that it’s called “oral sex.” You want to use your fingers and hands as MUCH as you can. It’s the same for women when giving men head. Always, always, always use your hands throughout the experience. It’s in the multidimensional sensations that the crazy arousals result.
So, entering her with your fingers, too, flicking against the vulvic walls, thrusting in and out, rotating, bending, twisting, is all particularly effective even when you’re chewing her upper regions, like the mons, or even the clit. Best you divide your time amongst all the northern regions, including the inner thighs and outer vaginal ridges.
Be sure you occasionally use the wonderful methodology of covering your teeth with your lips, then clamping down with varying pressures on all areas of her twat. This allows you to be a little more aggressive without hurting her and can help change the pace into something a little more aggressive and animalistic, if that’s your thing. It’s something better used towards the end of the session, though, than the beginning. Think of it as the second act in an exciting action film — it helps you build tension before the shoot’em-up conclusion.
Remember, though, a good number of us enjoy teeth, so make sure you check to see if a nibble’ll do us some good. Me, I like my men to be full-on carnivores, so long as the pressure and intensity isn’t too severe. I don’t like pain.
You can also fire up the vibe, too, and use the vibrator to slide in and out of her as you do any of the above approaches to the other areas of her vagina. Don’t forget to lube it up before insertion, though. This can be used at any point during the session, but again, is best used in verge-of-climaxing second act or last act.
All right, there are guys everywhere who swear by the “Alphabet Technique.” This technique basically entails the guy lying there and “writing out letters” on the surface of the vagina.
The guys’ll tell each other the money’s in this move, that it delivers the goods and gets her riled. They’ll even say, “Oh, I write her dirty notes…” Like we care. Sorry, but it’s true, and the chicks are just trying to spare your feelings.
So, enter Steff the mythbuster.
Honeys, if it takes you doing your ABCs to get us to “Oh!” then so be it. In reality, this doesn’t do for us nearly what you think it does. A tongue trickling over the surface of my cunt entertains me for a minute or so, but then you’d better expand your vocabulary in a hurry if “wild” is what you’re wanting us to read as.
Why do women respond, then? Simple: We don’t get the amount of surface coverage and exploration and variation that our organs really cry out for — considering the entire region south of our belly-buttons to our anus and from the inner-thighs to in-between is all one giant erogenous zone screaming for all-over doting and exploring. So we’ll take it where we can get it.
As part of your repertoire — a small part — it’s a fine thing. Don’t think it’s the last word, because it ain’t even a syllable, really.
Okay, here’s something I don’t think I’ve seen listed in sex tip manuals, but since I’m a hetero girl and I’ve never read up on cunnilingus, that would also make sense. I’ve had guys do this, but they don’t seem to ever realize just how goddamned effective it is, no matter how unsubtle the moaning or gasping becomes. In fact, most of the time it seems to be happening almost inadvertently, like it’s not something they’re intending to do, but just sorta happens. They seem to suffer under the delusion that it’s just what their tongue is doing that’s inciting the reaction. Nopers, not the case, kids.
Allow me to expound.
Now, I am not a Creationist, and never will be, but I gotta say, these “brilliant design” proponents might be onto something.
Why would I say this? Well, have you ever really considered the brilliance of putting the nose above the mouth? I, as a woman, applaud the good lord or whatever it was that deigned THAT as the place to put the nose.
Think about it. You slip your tongue into a woman, and where’s your nose? Hovering oh so wonderfully just above the clit. Oh, MY. I say get that bad boy in on the action. The fleshy cartilege of the nose is the perfect soft-but-firm clit-stimulating thing. Just nuzzle into the clit — in and up — as you thrust your tongue in and up, or you can do the wagging-dog side-to-side action with both your mouth and your nose. Hell, just in and out can do the trick, too. Definitely worth a shot. Do it all, says I. The more, the merrier. And the more I’ll want to repay you.
You get your hands massaging our breasts or teasing our anus (which may not work on select women), or whatever inspires you, and this can be a money shot for you.
If you’re one of those guys who’s always lamented the big size of his nose… It’s time to realize the gift you can give to the women in your life. And I promise, once she gets the goods, she’s gonna like your schnozz more than you can imagine.
But obviously, don’t forget to breathe before you give her the full-face treatment.
And expect that she’s soon gonna start giving you little pecks on that nose of yours and teasingly nibbling the end of it in between lip-kisses, secretly imagining the times you’ve brought her to the edge with that bad boy, now that it’s become a close personal friend of hers.
Brilliant design, my friends. Brilliant.
But so is the body as a whole. All those ways we can bend and move makes a myriad of approaches possible for every sexual experience, including oral. Don’t keep things limited to the same old position. Try moving around. Try in on the table, on the floor, wherever. Environment and position definitely affects these things.
But whatever you do, don’t forget the details.

33 thoughts on “The Man's Guide to Cunnilingus Pt. 3

  1. Anonymous

    Ah, I love the nose-idea!

    Except for that, your good girl’s guide really inspired me, and I just wrote my lover a long mail where I put a link to your blog and told him exactly what of this I want to do with him. He loves oral, but I’m pretty young and not very experienced, and I think it’s great that you’ve written the guide, helping me and others.

    Reply
  2. T

    Excellent post – it was worth the, ummm, attention. The nose thing in particular – I have a smallish nose, but since I don’t normally pay attention to what it is doing, I may not have noticed… hmmm… Food for thought.

    Although, I do feel compelled to stick up for the alphabet. To the extent that guys think that it is the holy grail – well, it may give them the confidence to go exploring, when they otherwise may have been confused by half remembered bits and pieces from high school biology.

    That being said, I hadn’t realized that guys were just writing out the letters lightly with their tongue. I only know my version, which is somewhat more interactive and involved. And like you said, it is just part of the vocabulary – not a silver bullet.

    But if I ever do get up the courage to ask for Steff’s number, maybe she’ll end up posting a follow-up to her trashing of the alphabet method. If I’m lucky, that is.

    Lucky and good. 🙂

    And I’m skeptical that women everywhere are now lusting after me, but on the chance that I’m wrong – my email address is on my blogger profile…

    🙂

    I wouldn’t mind being wrong this once…

    Reply
  3. scribe called steff

    ANON, ANON!

    Excellent move! “Things I lust to do to you” letters are so sexy, so hot. Experience is overrated. I’ve never slept around, but I’ve thoroughly explored the lovers I’ve had. There’s a delusion that sexually knowledgeable women have to “get around” in order to learn what they do.

    Two words for ya: Read Books.

    I will forever owe a debt of gratitude to “Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man.” Buy it before it goes out of print.

    http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0060392320/002-2095266-5872057?v=glance

    There are other great books out there, but that’s a good place to start. Explore your library’s sexuality section sometime, or better yet, read the books with your lover over a night of good wine and candlelight and make notes about all the things you want to try, while not doing anything other than nuzzling and cuddling. Later in the evening, let the games begin.

    Education can be SO arousing in a relationship, especially as you learn together. There are sex books I’ve yet to read ‘cos I’m saving them for someone special. I love that journey you take together. It’s so damned hot.

    So, yeah, go easy on yourself and remember that the learning curve is every bit as fun — especially when he knows you’re doing it to make him happier. He will almost certainly feel indebted to you for making the effort, and it will strengthen your relationships in ways you couldn’t have expected.

    I bet he’s already more turned on than you could expect. Guys love the innocence that comes from an inexperienced chick, and to know they’re the ones inspiring your corruption can be soooo good for them.

    Reply
  4. scribe called steff

    T — HEH! Well, the alphabet thing, it was funny. I’d had it done and had read it elsewhere, and then mentioned beginning this series to a guy I know at school yesterday and he said, “Oh, did you mention the alphabet technique?” and his eyes lit up as he said it.

    I’m not saying throw it out, but I am saying it ain’t the holy grail. Exactly. The holy grail is the WHOLE package — the variety, the speed-shifting, all of that mixed up. The moving up and down her body between doses, occasionally entering her for a thrust or two to taunt her mercilessly. All of that.

    “Interactive and involved” is always good.

    I’ll be posting a nifty URL in a day or so to a new vibrator that might just make that moreso the case, something I’ve yet to try, and am too financially depleted to order, but have already lustily fantasized about.

    As for asking for my number, I could so use a little action. Poor little Steff.

    Actually it’s a crime against man. I want to contribute to MANkind’s contentment, but am being deprived of my generosity. A real shame.fefoj

    Reply
  5. T

    Sure you SAY you could use some action, but you went and moved to Canada. However, I have always wanted to sing:

    Ohhhh…
    I wish you could meet my girlfriend, my girlfriend who lives in Canada.
    She couldn’t be sweeter
    I wish you could meet her,
    My girlfriend who lives in Canada!

    Her name is Alberta
    She lives in Vancouver
    She cooks like my mother
    And sucks like a Hoover.

    I e-mail her every single day
    Just to make sure that everything’s okay.
    It’s a pity she lives so far away, in Canada!

    Last week she was here, but she had the flu.
    Too bad
    ‘Cause I wanted to introduce her to you
    It’s so sad
    There wasn’t a thing that she could do
    But stay in bed with her legs up over her head!
    Oh!

    I wish you could meet my girlfriend,
    But you can’t because she is in Canada.
    I love her, I miss her, I can’t wait to kiss her,
    So soon I’ll be off to Alberta!
    I mean Vancouver!
    Shit! Her name is Alberta, she lives in Vancou-

    She’s my girlfriend!
    My wonderful girlfriend!
    Yes I have a girlfriend, who lives in Canada!!

    And I can’t wait to eat her pussy again!

    Although I could never sing it as well as Rod the puppet did in Avenue Q.

    Reply
  6. saltwatercowgirl

    All good all good Steff!

    Only ever had one guy do the nose thing, apart from the physical stimulation it makes you feel good to know a guy is comfortable really getting IN there, diving in without a snorkel so to speak.

    Reply
  7. scribe called steff

    SWCG — I was thinking to myself just now, “What’s a salt-water cow?” I think I need to move AWAY from the computer monitor.

    And very good point about the mental benefits of a guy diving in like that, using his nose.

    Be nosey… be very, very nosey. 🙂 We approve.

    _______

    T — You’re killing me. And you know, us westcoast girls are what it’s all about anyhow. Funny. Thanks for the laugh.

    And I never MOVED to Canada. I’m third/fourth generation. In fact, I’m the rare breed actually BORN in Vancouver. Blame it on my grandfolks.

    Reply
  8. T

    As soon as I wrote that, I knew – like schrodinger’s cat, that you would end up having lived in Vancouver all your life. But writing, “you’re the one who went and moved/was born in Canada” just doesn’t have the same oomph. eh?

    And I just noticed your comment earlier,

    “Guys love the innocence that comes from an inexperienced chick, and to know they’re the ones inspiring your corruption can be soooo good for them.”

    Oh yes. Soooo good. I second that comment with bells and whistles. And apparantly, it’s good for me, as well.

    Reply
  9. scribe called steff

    No, no, poetic license is something I approve of.

    Yeah, it’s why every guy fantasizes about virgins. It’s not the popping-the-cherry but the notion of introducing all the verboten to this young impressionable mind, and the idea that they can be made to do all those bad-girl little things that bring so much pleasure.

    I had a blast at 27 when I had this young 21-yr-old guy who’d never had a BJ before. I put ALL my efforts into him. It was WONDERFUL. I love teaching a lover new tricks. Quite the fun time.

    Reply
  10. Walking Wounded

    I think the nose was very clever. Damn, if its there why not use it constructively, eh? SWCG, you are too funny! And Steff, you are too awesome!

    Peace

    Reply
  11. scribe called steff

    Glad you learned something new! Get nosey! 🙂

    I don’t know about awesome, but I’ll agree to pretty frickin’ good! Tee hee.

    Just feeling feisty tonight. Too bad I’m solo.

    So stay tuned, WW, I’ll be addressing your questions in the next segment, which I’ve begun to write but MAY NOT have the time to post until the weekend. Not sure how my week’s gonna shake down, since I have a lit contest to edit stuff for in the next couple days.

    -s.

    Reply
  12. Shamus O'Drunkahan

    Thanks Steff, great stuff. I think most guys are eager to learn whatever they can to please their woman.

    Reply
  13. Mr. W

    Good tips Steff – just be careful not to discourage the alphabet trick, but do put it in it’s correct position. For “Cunnilingus Masters in training” it’s an indispensible tool. BUT guys – remember – It’s merely an appitizer. I might go down there and START with it to get things warmed up, but it’s just a short prancing and dancing to a lot of other fun stuff to come. Most of which you Steff, have outlined here.
    Once again – good job.

    Reply
  14. LeeLoreya

    this is just like school.wild turbulent chatting pupils and enlightening teacher.

    yes that is all. i’m no folk singer, me.

    Reply
  15. T

    Leeloroya – I want to go to the school you are going to. Unless the topic of conversation is physics or political science, instead of better oral sex. In which case, never mind.

    Mr.W – Right on! Fight the Power! They can have our alphabet trick when they pry it from our cold, dead tongues.

    And if they are willing to go that far, they can have it. ick.

    Reply
  16. scribe called steff

    Ha.

    Okay, know what? There’s a RIGHT TIME and a WRONG time to do the alphabet trick.

    Yes, I might’ve been too dismissive.

    Most of the time, the trick is more or less a fairly light, nice, enjoyable part of oral.

    BUT… if you’re attempting to “drive her wild,” and you’re already well into the session, and you decide to “pull back” and do the alphabet trick, it might undo all you’ve done. I think you need to keep it a little more active if you’ve already made “headway,” so to speak.

    I think it’s better used near the beginning of oral as a way to warm things up, and that would be cool, since it’d get the whole surface a little wet, and it’d touch all the bases, etc.

    But it’s about timing. Throwing it into the second or third act could backfire if Wild is what you’re wanting.

    So, yes, all right, GOOD trick, but needs to be done at an apprpriate time.

    Is that better?

    LEE — Smooches. Thanks, honey.

    Reply
  17. Sazzle

    I’m gonna agree on alphabet method as a warm up method. I’ve always enjoyed the game but my last boyfriend was a little reluctant to play. Ay well. He was a virgin and I did put quite a bit of effort into teaching him what I like, and also what he likes. Mainly because i knew it wasn’t going to last so I thought I;d send him into the world a little more educated. Hehe.

    Reply
  18. jazz

    so i have to say, you ask for comments an you get novellas here!

    i don’t have time to read through them all but wanted to say this guide is excellent still!

    Reply
  19. scribe called steff

    Sazzle — be interesting to see what T and W think about it as a warm-up, since they’re big believers in it.

    Jas — yeah, well, quadrupling traffic is going to have that effect! Crazy! Thanks for the comment. 🙂

    Reply
  20. T

    Using it as a warm up method is great – absolutely. My defense of it is mostly due to the fact that when I didn’t know what I was doing, it was a helpful crutch and a good starting point. The reaction I got was positive enough, that I thought to myself, “hey! I can do this! Now I want to do it better.”

    Better would have been if, at age 15 or so, I was with someone comfortable enough with sex to tell me what she liked and disliked. But that woman wasn’t hanging out by the Joust machine at the community center. Or maybe she was, and I missed her. While it definately isn’t a silver bullet, the alphabet method was far better than anything I would have come up with on my own, and enabled me to get enough encouragement that I wanted to learn more.

    Every woman is different, and wants different things at different times. So I don’t think you ever stop learning. Unless neither you or your partner are particularly into oral. In which case, a half assed bj and the alphabet method may suffice for you. But if you want to increase call backs and repeat business, I would absolutely recommend to any guy that he leave the alphabet method far behind, and learn some real skillz.

    Reply
  21. Ohpineyun

    Thank God I have a place for my long schlong above the lips to go now. God endowed the face not the groin and with your coaching I think I’ll be able to put it to the divine purpose it was intended for.

    Reply
  22. scribe called steff

    T — But if someone has read these postings, they have no need for a crutch. 😉

    Thanks for the comment — after bashing me earlier. 😛 Heh!

    Ohpin — It’s the human version of the bi-stimulating vibrators. I hope you find success with the technique. I’m sure you will. Glad I could contribute.

    Reply
  23. Anonymous

    oh the nose…. AND the chin, especially with a 3-day stubble while he’s focused on the clit… so much to add to oral…

    Reply
  24. Wags

    Steff,
    I loved this series. I’ve been reading your site for a couple of weeks, but tonight I spent some time to start going through your archives and stumbled across this series. You did a great job covering the topic. I’m always on the look out for tips and your articles were very descriptive. While I seem to actually follow most of the things you suggest, the one thing I probably don’t do enough of is using my hands. I really need to let my fingers play more while my mouth wonders elsewhere or takes a break (I’ve actually gotten stiffness in the jaw from eating a girl for too long). I don’t know if I agree with T, 10:1 seems a bit much, I might get tongue cramps, but I could definitely see a 3:1 ratio. Also I’ll definitely have to try the Honey Dust from Kama Sutra, it sounds yummy. But first things first, I have to find someone to practice on, its been WAY to long.

    Keep up the good work!
    -d

    Reply
  25. Anonymous

    i am a men who is 49 yrs old and is suffering from high blood pressure and diabetics . I have problem with keeping my dick hard for some time . I like to masturbate my wife . I put two finger inside her cunt and rub her clit vigarously until she shudders . I can feel the rytham of her orgasam in my fingers . But she says her smomach aches after she has oragasam

    Reply
  26. DevilDuck

    I know this if an old page but in just stumbled upon it after you came up in a bondage search. The guide is great while I think I am pretty good at oral you can never learn enough. I had never thought of using the nose but will now. I would also like add to lift her pelvis. Either with pillows or they sell wedges (www.liberator.com). This allows MUCH better access I feel it’s a more natural position. Additionally it makes it easier to use fingers or a toy as theres now space between the bed and her pussy/your face.

    Reply
  27. Bruce

    My goodness. Who are you, you lovely creature. Thank you so much. This is a wonderful article and although my wife will never know of it, I guarantee, she will appreciate it.

    Reply

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